


A Memoir

by GothieCakes



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Grinding, Kaito Momota/Shuichi Saihara - Freeform, M/M, Memories, Shuichi Saihara/Kaito Momota - Freeform, post chapter 5, sappy boys, shuichi is sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-04
Updated: 2018-02-04
Packaged: 2019-03-13 12:29:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,144
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13570611
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GothieCakes/pseuds/GothieCakes
Summary: Shuichi wouldn't give up the memories for the world... but, as 'The Ultimate Detective', he knows sometimes, it's better to forget.





	A Memoir

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this right after I finished chapter five, I was an emotional mess over these two. Kaito and Shuichi are my favorite boys so that chapter killed me, Ouma was also one of my favorites ever, and the whole situation was unfair and just knowing Shuichi accidentally did it again, solved what he didn't want to solve just...
> 
> Especially how he goes back after he solves it, trying to lie to save Kaito just... RIP Kaito;;; 
> 
> Also, I take requests on my twitter which is here: https://twitter.com/nnoites  
> feel free to follow me and request something :)
> 
> Anyways, as always enjoy!

Shuichi was paralyzed by the sudden force of the other's body against him. Kaito was taller, no doubt about that and his embrace warm, unlike anything else he experienced before… Shuichi knew that he shouldn't have fallen for him. Inside the walls of a killing game, at any moment the target would be on their backs… but.

 

This moment, everything about it…

“Kaito…” Shuichi looked up, a ghost of a smile on his lips as he tried to hide his concern for him. After everything had gone on with Ouma… finding out Kaito was sick… It was hard to look at him without being ultimately  _ worried _ . With a small huff, he was broken out of it, said huff coming from the taller, a pout on his face.

 

“Look, I already told you I'm not planning on dying here, so stop that… I can tell when you're worried about me so, stop just… I don't know, focus on something else?” 

 

It was true, maybe he was making something big out of nothing but… He wouldn't shake the feeling just yet.

 

“Ah, Kaito, but that's what I'm doing, if I'm not focusing on you, what else is there to focus on?” The words that escaped his own lips, he didn't know he could be that…

 

…

 

Smooth?

 

Shuichi could laugh just thinking about it.

 

Judging by the look on Kaito’s face, it seemed it worked, a faint red flush over his cheeks, 

 

“I don't know what I did to deserve this… but, I'm-- I’m glad. Even though, this is messed up, being in this whole situation. I feel like we can just ignore it. Together.” 

 

It was Shuichi’s turn to let out a small laugh, nuzzling his face into Kaito’s neck, a small sigh of relief. “Standing against my dorm wall like this, just talking, I feel like there's a lot more we can do so we forget about this… Just for a bit, maybe?”

 

The response came quicker than he ever intended, Kaito moving to his ear, breath warm, his whole body shuddering at the sensation,

 

“Can… I kiss you?”

 

Shuichi didn't have a response, his lips against the taller’s. Brief, quick, but nonetheless made both of their hearts beat faster than Shuichi had ever felt.

 

With a quick tug on Kaito's sleeve, he pulled him to his bed, ignoring the monitors, the spying… Anything-- all that mattered now, was Kaito. Sitting awkwardly, both with their eyes averted Kaito was the one to break the short pause, pulling Shuichi quickly on top of his lap, his back against the pillows as Shuichi's face once again found the  _ Luminary Of The Stars _ .

 

Everything was starting to feel hot, the way his coat unbuttoned easily, how their legs tangled as they slipped further into the pillows against the bed. The only sound of their lips smacking together. Kaito's hand was firm on his hip, slowly pushing his shirt up, testing how far he could go, Shuichi making a noise he never heard come from himself as he felt his hand over his bare skin. 

 

One hand stroking through his hair, Kaito had him lazily propped up against him, both of them laying back, Shuichi wondering still how it was getting so hot… From what he felt of Kaito pressing against him, it wasn't only him. 

 

Breaking for air, finally staring at each other… Kaito had an unsure look in his eyes, Shuichi gasping low before finally speaking, 

 

“Keep going, it's okay… I want this too, Kaito.” 

 

An unsteady nod, followed by a “Yeah.” must have given him all the confidence he needed to rest himself over Shuichi, returning to their original positions best as possible, Shuichi just prepared for what he knew came next, hand in Kaito's hair, he pressed their lips together once again. 

 

Through the moans and groans coming from them both, their hips moving against each other causing Shuichi to gasp out with every small touch, his body moving on its own.

 

“K-Kaito--!” 

 

Shuichi’s eyes seemed to snap open, sitting up in the unfamiliar bed, his boxers soaked through. Patting the spot beside him he felt a whole other wave of emotions overcome him.

 

Empty. 

 

But, what else was he expecting? He knew they had all saw it with their own eyes. The remaining ‘ _ Gifted Juveniles of Hope’s Peak Academy’. _

 

Clutching tight at his chest, he tried laying back down, the bed a mess from tossing and turning, hair disheveled… There wasn't anything they could do here, besides think about him. Think about how ashamed he would be if Kaito ever… 

No, that was impossible, he could solve mysteries, cases, to protect everyone, but he couldn't do the impossible. As much as Shuichi wished that the Necronomicon would work, even bringing Kaito back, there wouldn't be a point.

 

He was sick, and just the few times they would lay together, Shuichi falling asleep against him as he would speak of the stars. Even when he would fall asleep in his dorm he never made any move to wake him up, leaving him softly dozed away. Even if it meant Kaito sleeping sitting up with a hand stroked through navy locks.

  
  


…

......

.........

  
  


 Before he knew it, the eight familiar chimes of the morning announcement had played. A sense of emptiness deep in his chest all he could do was let more tears slip. 

 

“Kaito, I'm sorry… I'm… just so lonely…”

 

His fists clenched tight into the sheets underneath him, Shuichi shut his tear-filled eyes. He wished he could stop this, listen to what Kaito had told him, ‘Not to cry.’ to ‘smile.’ before he was taken away… Not just by Monokuma.

 

The disease would have killed him, but as much as he would have persisted Shuichi would push back, telling him not to exhort himself.

 

No, none of that happened now, his skills as a ‘Detective' didn't pay off in the most important situation… the one he cared for the most if he could catch it in time… But, he didn't. 

 

And, he regretted it.

 

With his head buried into the pillow, he grabbed the extra one and pulled it close to him, holding it tight, a memento maybe of what Kaito's arms around him felt like, what he longed for.

 

“Kaito… it's hard, it's so difficult without you… I'll try because we made a promise… but, it doesn't stop the aching and dreams every day. It's... so much harder than it looks…”

 

The room stayed silent of course, his mumbling to himself barely an echo off the walls, 

 

“I miss you…” 

 

With a night of restless sleep, the constant thoughts in his mind, he found himself slowly dozing off. Still clutching firmly to the memory of Kaito. Even if it was all fake, his memories were enough to slowly put him at ease.

 

One final thought in his mind raced through, three words, 

 

Thank you, Kaito.

**Author's Note:**

> Just a reminder, I take requests on my twitter which is here: https://twitter.com/nnoites  
> feel free to follow and hit me up anytime on these two!
> 
> Kudos, Comments, and bookmarks are super appreciated! 
> 
> Thank you for reading ;w;


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